California Adventure, Part One
Editor's Note:
Due to exams, The Humble Boast will be running previously published posts from the summer of 2003 for the next week or so. During that summer, I worked in Los Angeles - specifically, Burbank and Santa Monica - for two production companies. I spent a lot of time doing bitch work, but it was a great experience. It was also life-changing: though my jobs were great, I hated LA so much that I decided to go to law school rather than move out there after undergrad.
Anyway, I was unfamiliar with blogging at the time, but I kept my friends and family updated through a series of weekly emails. This is the first of them, written June 8, 2003.
Warning: The following message may contain name-dropping. The author apologizes if this makes him look like a prick.
Here I am in sunny LA...well, that's stretching the truth a bit...I know the sun is there, but it is hard to see it through all of the smog...I woke up on my first morning here and thought that the mist between the hills was a cool summer fog...and boy was I wrong. The locals call it the "June Gloom", but due to my phobia of rhyming names, I just call it "overcast".
I departed from Dallas on the 30th of May and trekked across Texas all of Friday. I learned that driving for ten hours and finding that you're still in the same state totally sucks. I rolled into El Paso that evening and crashed for the night. I had some free time to kill, and as nice as the Red Roof Inn is, I decided to drive around a bit, because although I had been in my car for ten straight hours, I thought I needed some more. After a short jog around "The Paso", as I like to call it, I arrived back in my area of town and decided to catch a flick. As I sat down, I realized that while I love movies, there is really nothing more depressing than sitting down in a theater alone. At least Bruce Almighty was pretty good.
I spent Saturday wandering across the desert - come to think of it, I really hadn't seen grass since Abilene - and found myself wondering why we made Arizona a state and why people live there. I stopped in Tuscon to grab some lunch and discovered that it was 103 in the shade - literally. When I told my dad this, he said, "At least it's a dry heat." Look, I'm sorry but 103 is 103. And June isn't even their hot month. I got to Phoenix that afternoon and found a nice little Super 8 to rest my head. It was here that I discovered that Arizona doesn't recognize Daylight Savings Time - I guess they have no need, since it would take a complete idiot to try to farm in Phoenix. I had a nice little dinner at Denny's, where I decided that eating at Denny's alone was far more depressing than going to the movies alone because at least no one can see you in the movie theater. I think even the waitresses at Denny's felt bad for me - they kept coming up to me and asking if I felt all right. They didn't ask if I needed anything or if I was doing all right, they asked if I felt all right, as if I was about to throw myself off a building.
I awoke Sunday morning and started off on my final leg of the journey. I finally arrived in California and knew I was close to LA when I could see the aforementioned smog in the air. Unfortunately, I was in San Bernadino, which is still 70 miles out. It was nothing but cars and traffic from there on in, but since it was a Sunday, it wasn't too bad. I found the house I am staying in with ease. It is in North Hollywood, in the Valley, and only about ten minutes from my job at Warner Brothers. The house backs up to the Hollywood Freeway, but you can't hear the traffic noise at all. I am staying with a delightful lady named Judy Corbett, who owns and runs a costuming business called J&M Costumers. (You can see their website and all of the different things they have made at www.jmcostumers.com.) Judy is a wonderful host, providing me with everything from a bed to a lot of my basic foodstuffs. And she is also a fascinating lady. She has hundreds of books lining her walls on every subject imaginable, and she has read them all. She's great and I cannot thank her enought for taking me in.
My first day of work was Monday and I arrived at the studio around ten. The office for the company I work for at Warner Brothers is called Mad Chance and they have a little bungalow on the northeast side of the lot. I think I mentioned it in my introductory note, but for those of you who did not get that one, I will do a quick rehash of some of the films Mad Chance has produced: Assassins, Space Cowboys, Death to Smoochy, and Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, to name a few. Everyone in the office is very friendly, though I work mainly with the assistants, doing the stuff that they don't want to do: copying, runing errands, etc. But it's not bad. I get to read a lot of scripts, particularly the ones they are considering. The company just finished shooting a film called "Mission Without Permission", which, they admit, is one of the worst titles ever, but is the one that Fox wanted. It's in post-production right now and should be coming out sometime in the next six months or so. I read the script and was pleasantly surprised. Even though it's a kids movie (think Spy Kids), I thought the story was smart enough to hold an adult's interest. And it just so happens that it was written by two guys who went to Baylor (they also wrote 2 Fast 2 Furious, another horrible title).
On Wednesday, I had my first day at David Ladd Films in Santa Monica. Some of their credits include: "Hart's War" and "A Guy Thing". Basically, I will work at Mad Chance on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays and at David Ladd on Mondays and Wednesdays. Anyway, their offices are in the MGM Plaza, and they share a suite with Irish Dreamtime, which happens to be Pierce Brosnan's production company. Alas, Pierce was not in, but his nice corner office was wide open and when no one is around, we go in and pretend to be important. When I say we, I mean the two assistants at David Ladd, who happen to be guys (striking a blow for women's empowerment). The big project that this company is working on is a movie called "Man on Third", about a star baseball player and his jealous brother. I read it and it was pretty good, but I am also partial to baseball movies.
Nothing much happened on Thursday, but on Friday, I returned to David Ladd (since I didn't go on Monday). Sure enough, they were having a meeting with possible "talent" for the baseball movie, so I got to hang out with Tom Welling, the guy from "Smallville", for a bit while his agent and David Ladd (the producer for whom the company is named) talked about whatever producers and agents talk about. He was pretty cool - we played ping pong in the kitchen/copy/ping pong room while this was going on. For the record - I won 3 out of 4.
On Friday night, simply because I could, I went to see a movie at the Chinese Theater. That was the good news. The bad news was that it was The Italian Job. But going to see the theater was worth it - it was huge and gorgeous - even if it did cost $10. That's right, ten bones for a movie. I could go to two in Waco for that. As we left the theater, we passed by the Kodak Theater (where they have awards shows and stuff), which is right next door. Apparently, the Essence Awards (I don't know what they are either) were going on, so there was a huge red carpet out and all these cameras and stuff. There was a break in the carpet so that pedestrians could cross, and while most of our group (I went with co-workers) crossed with ease, one guy was not as lucky. He seemed to cross a little too close to Mary J. Blige's posse, and was "helped" across by a giant bodyguard, who shoved him our direction. It was entertaining for all.
My weekend was pretty uneventful due to my not studying for the LSAT - try as I might, I couldn't get motivated - but I did manage to run down to Hollywood one night and see Wes Cunningham (Baylor grad, brother of Julia) play at some club called the Knitting Factory. It was a good show, until Wes finished and the red head from the B-52s starting singing Beatles covers. I slowly backed away from the room and fled.
Monday came along and I went down to USC to take the LSAT. USC was a nice enough place, but it is surrounded by the ghetto. And I don't mean the Waco ghetto. I mean LA, been through riots, big fences around the campus, ghetto. Imagine Baylor if it were thrown in South Oak Cliff (or the Fifth Ward for those of you in Houston). Fun times. I was proud of myself for branding the area around USC "Waco, CA." So, if you know anyone who goes to USC, know that their school ain't that nice.
Before I wrap up, just a few things I have learned in my first week:
1. The guy who designed the freeway on-ramps in California is a moron.
2. Having the news come on at eleven instead of ten is weird.
3. If you own an ugly house on ugly land in an ugly part of town, slap some palm trees on you property in an effort to fool yourself.
4. LA drivers are dumber than Houston and Dallas drivers COMBINED. (At least there's a wreck when the traffic slows down in Texas.)
5. When you hear that Hollywood has been "cleaned up", do not believe it - unless you like XXX shops (Jason James) and crappy souvenir stores.
And thus we leave our hero for the week...tune in next time for further misadventures, which will most likely include: my frustrations with Phil Mickelson not winning the U.S. Open, waking up with a cat sleeping on my head again, and more overcast days.
Due to exams, The Humble Boast will be running previously published posts from the summer of 2003 for the next week or so. During that summer, I worked in Los Angeles - specifically, Burbank and Santa Monica - for two production companies. I spent a lot of time doing bitch work, but it was a great experience. It was also life-changing: though my jobs were great, I hated LA so much that I decided to go to law school rather than move out there after undergrad.
Anyway, I was unfamiliar with blogging at the time, but I kept my friends and family updated through a series of weekly emails. This is the first of them, written June 8, 2003.
Warning: The following message may contain name-dropping. The author apologizes if this makes him look like a prick.
Here I am in sunny LA...well, that's stretching the truth a bit...I know the sun is there, but it is hard to see it through all of the smog...I woke up on my first morning here and thought that the mist between the hills was a cool summer fog...and boy was I wrong. The locals call it the "June Gloom", but due to my phobia of rhyming names, I just call it "overcast".
I departed from Dallas on the 30th of May and trekked across Texas all of Friday. I learned that driving for ten hours and finding that you're still in the same state totally sucks. I rolled into El Paso that evening and crashed for the night. I had some free time to kill, and as nice as the Red Roof Inn is, I decided to drive around a bit, because although I had been in my car for ten straight hours, I thought I needed some more. After a short jog around "The Paso", as I like to call it, I arrived back in my area of town and decided to catch a flick. As I sat down, I realized that while I love movies, there is really nothing more depressing than sitting down in a theater alone. At least Bruce Almighty was pretty good.
I spent Saturday wandering across the desert - come to think of it, I really hadn't seen grass since Abilene - and found myself wondering why we made Arizona a state and why people live there. I stopped in Tuscon to grab some lunch and discovered that it was 103 in the shade - literally. When I told my dad this, he said, "At least it's a dry heat." Look, I'm sorry but 103 is 103. And June isn't even their hot month. I got to Phoenix that afternoon and found a nice little Super 8 to rest my head. It was here that I discovered that Arizona doesn't recognize Daylight Savings Time - I guess they have no need, since it would take a complete idiot to try to farm in Phoenix. I had a nice little dinner at Denny's, where I decided that eating at Denny's alone was far more depressing than going to the movies alone because at least no one can see you in the movie theater. I think even the waitresses at Denny's felt bad for me - they kept coming up to me and asking if I felt all right. They didn't ask if I needed anything or if I was doing all right, they asked if I felt all right, as if I was about to throw myself off a building.
I awoke Sunday morning and started off on my final leg of the journey. I finally arrived in California and knew I was close to LA when I could see the aforementioned smog in the air. Unfortunately, I was in San Bernadino, which is still 70 miles out. It was nothing but cars and traffic from there on in, but since it was a Sunday, it wasn't too bad. I found the house I am staying in with ease. It is in North Hollywood, in the Valley, and only about ten minutes from my job at Warner Brothers. The house backs up to the Hollywood Freeway, but you can't hear the traffic noise at all. I am staying with a delightful lady named Judy Corbett, who owns and runs a costuming business called J&M Costumers. (You can see their website and all of the different things they have made at www.jmcostumers.com.) Judy is a wonderful host, providing me with everything from a bed to a lot of my basic foodstuffs. And she is also a fascinating lady. She has hundreds of books lining her walls on every subject imaginable, and she has read them all. She's great and I cannot thank her enought for taking me in.
My first day of work was Monday and I arrived at the studio around ten. The office for the company I work for at Warner Brothers is called Mad Chance and they have a little bungalow on the northeast side of the lot. I think I mentioned it in my introductory note, but for those of you who did not get that one, I will do a quick rehash of some of the films Mad Chance has produced: Assassins, Space Cowboys, Death to Smoochy, and Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, to name a few. Everyone in the office is very friendly, though I work mainly with the assistants, doing the stuff that they don't want to do: copying, runing errands, etc. But it's not bad. I get to read a lot of scripts, particularly the ones they are considering. The company just finished shooting a film called "Mission Without Permission", which, they admit, is one of the worst titles ever, but is the one that Fox wanted. It's in post-production right now and should be coming out sometime in the next six months or so. I read the script and was pleasantly surprised. Even though it's a kids movie (think Spy Kids), I thought the story was smart enough to hold an adult's interest. And it just so happens that it was written by two guys who went to Baylor (they also wrote 2 Fast 2 Furious, another horrible title).
On Wednesday, I had my first day at David Ladd Films in Santa Monica. Some of their credits include: "Hart's War" and "A Guy Thing". Basically, I will work at Mad Chance on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays and at David Ladd on Mondays and Wednesdays. Anyway, their offices are in the MGM Plaza, and they share a suite with Irish Dreamtime, which happens to be Pierce Brosnan's production company. Alas, Pierce was not in, but his nice corner office was wide open and when no one is around, we go in and pretend to be important. When I say we, I mean the two assistants at David Ladd, who happen to be guys (striking a blow for women's empowerment). The big project that this company is working on is a movie called "Man on Third", about a star baseball player and his jealous brother. I read it and it was pretty good, but I am also partial to baseball movies.
Nothing much happened on Thursday, but on Friday, I returned to David Ladd (since I didn't go on Monday). Sure enough, they were having a meeting with possible "talent" for the baseball movie, so I got to hang out with Tom Welling, the guy from "Smallville", for a bit while his agent and David Ladd (the producer for whom the company is named) talked about whatever producers and agents talk about. He was pretty cool - we played ping pong in the kitchen/copy/ping pong room while this was going on. For the record - I won 3 out of 4.
On Friday night, simply because I could, I went to see a movie at the Chinese Theater. That was the good news. The bad news was that it was The Italian Job. But going to see the theater was worth it - it was huge and gorgeous - even if it did cost $10. That's right, ten bones for a movie. I could go to two in Waco for that. As we left the theater, we passed by the Kodak Theater (where they have awards shows and stuff), which is right next door. Apparently, the Essence Awards (I don't know what they are either) were going on, so there was a huge red carpet out and all these cameras and stuff. There was a break in the carpet so that pedestrians could cross, and while most of our group (I went with co-workers) crossed with ease, one guy was not as lucky. He seemed to cross a little too close to Mary J. Blige's posse, and was "helped" across by a giant bodyguard, who shoved him our direction. It was entertaining for all.
My weekend was pretty uneventful due to my not studying for the LSAT - try as I might, I couldn't get motivated - but I did manage to run down to Hollywood one night and see Wes Cunningham (Baylor grad, brother of Julia) play at some club called the Knitting Factory. It was a good show, until Wes finished and the red head from the B-52s starting singing Beatles covers. I slowly backed away from the room and fled.
Monday came along and I went down to USC to take the LSAT. USC was a nice enough place, but it is surrounded by the ghetto. And I don't mean the Waco ghetto. I mean LA, been through riots, big fences around the campus, ghetto. Imagine Baylor if it were thrown in South Oak Cliff (or the Fifth Ward for those of you in Houston). Fun times. I was proud of myself for branding the area around USC "Waco, CA." So, if you know anyone who goes to USC, know that their school ain't that nice.
Before I wrap up, just a few things I have learned in my first week:
1. The guy who designed the freeway on-ramps in California is a moron.
2. Having the news come on at eleven instead of ten is weird.
3. If you own an ugly house on ugly land in an ugly part of town, slap some palm trees on you property in an effort to fool yourself.
4. LA drivers are dumber than Houston and Dallas drivers COMBINED. (At least there's a wreck when the traffic slows down in Texas.)
5. When you hear that Hollywood has been "cleaned up", do not believe it - unless you like XXX shops (Jason James) and crappy souvenir stores.
And thus we leave our hero for the week...tune in next time for further misadventures, which will most likely include: my frustrations with Phil Mickelson not winning the U.S. Open, waking up with a cat sleeping on my head again, and more overcast days.
posted by The Humble Best at 1:21 AM
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